A Day Better than Christmas!

For us baseball fans, today is unlike any other-- baseball's trading deadline looms, ending at 4 p.m. EST.

It doesn't look like the Red Sox's Manny Ramirez is going anywhere, Alfonso Soriano has a 50/50 chance to go to the Minnesota Twins and a bevy of pitchers have their bags packed to go on to their next destination. And where are the A's and Yankees putting their chips?

As Mark Starr of Newsweek puts it, "[t]his is the week in baseball that the rich get richer and the poor get…well, maybe they get a glimmer of hope for the future. And this is the week that separates the fanatics from the fans. The fanatics wallow in the baseball fantasy. They dissect every rumor and dream of that one perfect player—or, if they are greedy, several—that can propel their favorite team to new heights. Virtually every player out there is fair game for our fevered imaginations."

That would describe me to a "t". For the majority of the day, I'll be reloading the ESPN newswire and RotoWorld incessantly, while tuned into ESPNews. I'm stocked up on cigarettes, food and Minute Maid. It will take a great deal to make me move from the couch (yes, I am wearing pants).

As Starr puts it, "we should really enjoy all those big trades now— before any are actually made. And before reality intrudes, as it so often does both in baseball and in life, to spoil all our fun."

[Update]: As Harold Reynolds just said on ESPNews, today was "very disappointing." No big trades at all, all that were traded was B-level players like Matt Lawton, Kyle Farnsworth, Geoff Blum, Buddy Groom and Ron Villone. Fanatics everywhere got COAL!

Note to Self...

Do not look to see if there is an expiration date on the bottom of the mayonnaise jar, especially when you flip it upside down and you have taken off the lid. According to the law of physics (albeit not specifically), the mayo will exit the jar. Onto yor rug. Ugh.

Don't Blame Me, I Voted for Krucoff!

The latest edition of Gawker Hotties has hit, this time featuring the women of Conde Nast. No comment, other than the above.

Also, on another Gawker-related note, I think this is perhaps the best, vicious, funniest putdown I've ever seen on the site, equating CBS' "The Early Show" ratings prowess with their upcoming softball game against "Good Morning America": "This should be a fun game to watch, mostly because it’ll be fascinating to see the "Early Show" folks play. A softball game involves only two teams, so how will they manage to end up in a distant third place? We’re sure they’ll find a way."

Daaaamn.

Beauty and the Beast, Respectively

So this is how I appear to others, eh? I'm never leaving the apartment again.

The amazingly intelligent gal on the left is Rachel Sklar, editor of mediabistro's FishbowlNY, a gossip blog devoted to New York media. Love the site, be sure to visit it. Met her at the mediabistro party this Tuesday, at Mannahatta.

I am such a geek for even asking the photographer for the photo. Argh. Many thanks to Brian Van Nieuwenhoven, the mb photographer and editor of the NY Post "Meet Market" review site The Lectern for putting up with me.

Harry Reid, Former Boxer, Connects With a Right Hook

The more I see of Harry Reid (the senator from Nevada and Senate Democratic leader), the more I like him.

To wit, Reid takes stock on the Senate’s 100th day of legislative business: “In the past 100 days, Republicans found time to confirm right-wing judges, to protect Karl Rove and to take up the business of their special interest friends. But at the same time, they couldn’t spend an extra day supporting our troops or helping families afford health care. It’s a record that reveals how out of touch Republicans have become. There are not many days left on the Senate Calendar, but there is still time for Republicans to stop doing the business of a radical few and to join Democrats in taking up a common-sense reform agenda that works for America’s families.”

He then goes on to list, point by point, what has been "accomplished" during this time.

Beautifully, beautifully positioned.

So What is That "Aristocrats" Film All About?

I've been fairly intrigued by the film coming out that recounts -- via a bevy of comedians, all with their unique takes -- "The Greatest Dirty Joke Ever Told," as the New York Times calls it.

God bless Google-- Enjoy!

Why Don't People Like News?

Someone finally gets -- and says -- why there are all these polls about how everyday people don't like news, in particular conservatives.

Chicago Tribune columnist Charles M. Madigan nails it here: "The problem conservative critics have with modern news media is the same problem conservative critics have always had with news media...What they really dislike is journalism."

God bless you, Chuck.

Talk about a sleeper novel...

Over the weekend, I picked up -- and devoured -- Alex Garland's "The Coma" (which just came out in paperback). Damn good book, it's a quick read that clocks in at 200 pages. Although the book picked up some good reviews upon its initial release last summer in hardcover, it was quickly forgotten by consumers.

It's a hard right turn for Garland, who wrote "The Beach" (written ten years ago at this point-- time goes by quick) and "The Tesseract," as well as the screenplay for "28 Days Later." And it's probably his best effort to date.

Illustrated with woodcuts by Garland's father, this is the tale of Carl. As the book's publisher says: "When Carl awakens from a coma after being attacked on a subway train, life around him feels unfamiliar, even strange. He arrives at his best friend's house without remembering how he got there; he seems to be having an affair with his secretary, which is pleasant but surprising. He starts to notice distortions in his experience, strange leaps in his perception of time. Is he truly reacting with the outside world, he wonders, or might he be terribly mistaken? So begins a dark psychological drama that raises questions about the boundaries of consciousness." As Carl grapples with his predicament, "The Coma" plays with conventions, and questions our assumptions about the way we exist in the world, even as it draws us into the unsettling and suspenseful story of a lost suitcase and a forgotten identity."

Very Kafka-esque, very good-- check it out.

Augusten Burroughs Scares Me.

One of the authors I've been catching up on the past two months has been Augusten Burroughs, he of "Running with Scissors" and "Dry" fame. Have finished those two books, I'm now in the midst of reading "Magical Thinking," a collection of short stories, comprised of vignettes from his life.

What I have read sometimes scares the hell out of me. It's not his early life or his sexual proclivities. And I'm not talking about the pedophilia from "Scissors" or the rehab scenes from "Dry"-- what really scared me was something he wrote in "Thinking." Something that takes place in the East Village as well.

After killing a mouse in his bathrub, he writes what a plumber told him: "Vermin sometimes climb up into the plumbing and get trapped in the shower head." Going along this path, he then says, "[w]hich meant that I may have been showering, may still be showering, may someday be showering with piping-hot water filtered through the carcass of a dead rat, without even knowing it."

This disturbs me more than anything Brett Easton Ellis could write, a la the scene in "American Psycho" with the rat.

And I am definitely taking a closer look at my showerhead tomorrow.

Yes, the rumor is true...

...I shaved my head last Monday.

The event was cathartic. People passed me in halls not knowing who I was. I'd wave at someone and there would be a five-second delay as they figured out who the heck I was. I'd gone from long hair, to a narrow cut, to nothing, in the space of three weeks.

Before this, I was a redhead. To go from a very distinctive hair color to the shaved-head look is a big change for me and requires some thought-- it was part of who I was and how people knew me. What would happen if I got rid of the red eyebrows I bear, a clue as to who I was?

So, this is what it is like to be like everyone else...